Behold this tale from the days of yore when I worked as a register monkey in a gas station. I’d just gotten switched over from night to day shift. Common sense would dictate that the worst events happen during the night, but no – Homeless zombies drunk at...
Childcare in the modern digital age is a challenge. How are parents supposed to balance the task of teaching their child to take a dump in the proper place as well as give Junior the skills to compete in today’s increasingly competitive Angry Birds market? Enter...
One of my favorite skate memories involved me and a bunch of my older hoodlum friends sitting around in the park trying to ollie over beer bottles. I’d wrecked my hand trying to ollie over the world’s tiniest pebble, so of course I was sitting on my...
Hey there kids! Today I’m here to teach you how to make an awesome birthday card for your mom. Handmade gifts are perfect since mothers everywhere love the stuff you make, no matter how crappy it is. Plus it’s free. Minimal effort + low cost = success, so...
Ever since I was a chubby little child, I’ve always loved Halloween. Nowadays it’s more for the skanky costumes, but I used to be all about the candy. October meant at least half a month worth of soaring sugar highs and diabetic delights, culminating in...
