Howdy readers! Are you ready to wade into the murky depths of online dating? Many of you are familiar with Tinder, but did you know Craigslist is the OG source for scoring anonymous sex on the internet? Lately I’ve gotten a lot of emails from guys asking whether or not it’s possible to get laid on Craigslist Casual Encounters. The answer is “yes, you can get laid on Casual Encounters”.
First off, there are two tactics (that I’m aware of) that you can use to write a successful Casual Encounters ad.
- Option 1 More or less write an erotica fantasy. Make sure you work out a lot.
- Option 2 Write something with a softer message acknowledging the absurdity of trolling the internet for random action. Also make sure you work out a lot.
Today we’re going to explore Option #2. Take a look at the ad below that caused me to meet an actual living, breathing woman.
Top 5 Reasons Why We Should Bang Before I Move Out Of State!
This is pretty much the best week ever. Not only is it less than 100 degrees, I also landed a badass job, and I only have to move halfway across the country to work there! In less than a month I turn into a pumpkin, so get your Prince Charming while the gettin’s good. Without further ado, here’s the Top 5 Reasons Why We Should Bang Before I Move Out Of State:
1 – I can actually hold a conversation. No boring office job anecdotes either. I’m talking cool stuff like why Blackbeard is the best pirate or the funny story about how Miss Teen Colorado puked in my back yard. If you’d rather just shut up and hook up, I can be the “strong, silent type” as well. Like the cover of a Fabio romance novel but with less hair and Italian accents.
2 – Sexy and I know it. I’m pretty decent looking and jacked so you’ll probably like what you see. Plus I have an Ass of Steel from lots o’ squats. Crazy barbarian sex is way easier/better with an athletic guy.
3 – I’m not creepy, needy or weird. Writing a Craigslist ad is kinda strange, I’ll admit it. I’m mainly doing this out of curiosity. My dating track record includes a whopping 0 restraining orders and I’m allergic to lurking in the bushes. Plus have you seen gas prices lately? Stalking is way too expensive, especially if you live across town.
4 – No dick pictures. Gallup polls show that 99% of the American public doesn’t want to see a picture of some guy’s dick. You have my ironclad guarantee that you will not receive any dick pics.
5 – I’m outta here! That means we hang out and have fun together for a whole month. Stay up all night then roll out of bed at 10 AM? Hellz to the yeah. We aren’t under any obligation to keep in touch after I leave unless we like each other. Win for everybody.
Sound good? Holla atcha boy with an email telling me about yourself along with your picture and let’s get the party started. Looking forward to an awesome goodbye!
Why Did The Ad Work?
I got probably 30 email responses from running this ad. Though roughly 75% of them fell outside of my acceptable dating range, that still left a pretty good amount of potential. Let’s see what I did:
- It’s funny. Women love a sense of humor. Not everybody is a master comedian like yours truly, but working in some funny stuff goes a long way. Just make sure you can back it up in person – writing is a very different ballgame than actual conversation.
- I’m in great shape. The pic/caption above is the one I used in the ad. Physical condition is the #1 most important thing when it comes to internet dating, so make sure you look your best. Choose favorable lighting and take a pic in the morning when you’re slightly dehydrated to make your muscles pop. Two things I didn’t do in this pic that I now recommend – Shave your chest to look stronger (plus it feels cleaner) and wear boxer briefs. Women generally don’t like boxers and they abhor whitey tighties (duh). I’d suggest cropping your face out of the pic – the last thing you need is Ethel in HR responding to your foot fetish ad.
- There’s a time constraint. Time constraints are a call to action. This wound up being both good and bad. I met one really great girl that I would’ve loved to date. Too bad for me since I was moving. However, it opened the doors to some other opportunities that wouldn’t present themselves with a traditional dating ad.
- It’s a “soft sell”. A lot of Keyboard Kommandos will read this and say, “Wow, he’s a betabetabetabeta for even meeting girls on the internet! And check out that weak ass ad. He sounds like a nice guy. What a gay fag!” Guess what? A large segment of the female population girls isn’t interested in choking on your Alpha Male Dick of Destiny™©. The soft sell works as long as you don’t come off sounding needy or like a wuss. I had fun writing this ad and met some cool, laid-back girls who appreciated the humor, transparency and lack of general thirsty weirdness that permeates American internet dating culture.
Final note – Don’t outright copy this ad!
You aren’t me and anybody you meet will know it. Deconstruct what I did and create your own, you unoriginal fuck.